17.7.08

BLAKE BUTLER IS THE ONE PERSON I WON'T KILL WITH A NINE IRON WHEN MY DAD SATAN COMES BACK TO EARTH (BUT I STILL MIGHT HIT HIM IN THE SHIN WITH IT)

blake butler (author and non-meanhead) blogged about my book. he sent me a nice email about it and it made me feel better. he said if anyone had balls they would publish it which i like because now when it gets denied, i'll just send back an email that says: "oh ok, that's fine, but uh, just so you know, blake butler thinks you got no balls". that's comforting. the book is now completely done, i finished it yesterday by adding two new things, one of which is a really long poem called AND I SMASH MY SMILE AGAINST YOURS which i am proud of. there are a few people looking at the book but i haven't heard back from anyone. i am kind of worthless because it seems like if someone denies it, i will just delete my blog and jump into outer space to just float and cry and then when the tears float out i will eat them until i am dehydrated. writing the book made me feel better. i was very angry and self-destructive when i wrote it. i'd come home every day and stand in the doorway looking into my gray apartment and take a deep breath then walk in. then i'd microwave some oatmeal and lean on the my counter looking out my window at pretty girls as they walked by. then i'd walk up to my room and shut the door and lock it and sit down for hours straight. sometimes i'd lay back and look at my ceiling and feel strangely calm. but for the most part, i'd type while rocking back and forth and squeezing my hands really tight and there were a lot of lightning storms during the time i was writing and i was always hoping that a bolt would fly through my window and blow a hole in my chest and that i'd pass out dead on my laptop, so the last line of the book would be something like jjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjj. i kind of want to talk about the book a lot but i don't want to be boring. i think it calmed me, but when the fall comes i always feel crushed and angry again. we'll see. i hope the book gets published because i feel like it has value.

also, the jaguar uprising should be putting out the chapbook soon and from what i hear it is going to be way nicer than i imagined, although now i am worried because the design might be nicer than the material. it'll be like getting a gold box with a single lego inside.

12 comments:

Josh Maday said...

i hope to be able to read your book soon. it sounds good. do not destroy yourself by jumping into space.

sam pink said...

thank you. but i am already in space. i have internet access because outer space is all internet.

DOGZPLOT said...

jjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjj jjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjj jjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjj jjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjj jjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjj jjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjj jjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjj jjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjj jjjjjjjj jjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjj jjjjjjjjjjj j j j j j j j j j j j

gena said...

j k l m n o p

apants said...

turds! I want a chapsbook where it has a picture of you wearing fur chaps. fur chaps. furchapsbook. My point is, who'se loose labia do I gotta suck to get books and chapbooks. I want to give them as christmas presents this year! For serious, dude!

BLAKE BUTLER said...

i like to hear about germination periods

do not be afraid

ryan manning said...

what would jesus do

sam pink said...

if i had fur chaps, everything would be different.

jereme said...

jesus would do a kick flip, read sam's opus, land on his sandle clad feet, clap his hands together and show you there is nothing behind his sleeves

and then a flash of light
that can be heard
but not seen

a chicken shits out an egg

and existense finally ends

roll credits

that is what jesus would fucking do

write it down

jereme said...

sandal clad

i wish jesus would teach me to proof read what i write

that would be mighty white of him

ryan manning said...

a lego made of angel placenta

freefun0616 said...

酒店經紀人,
菲梵酒店經紀,
酒店經紀,
禮服酒店上班,
酒店小姐兼職,
便服酒店經紀,
酒店打工經紀,
制服酒店工作,
專業酒店經紀,
合法酒店經紀,
酒店暑假打工,
酒店寒假打工,
酒店經紀人,
菲梵酒店經紀,
酒店經紀,
禮服酒店上班,
酒店經紀人,
菲梵酒店經紀,
酒店經紀,
禮服酒店上班,
酒店小姐兼職,
便服酒店工作,
酒店打工經紀,
制服酒店經紀,
專業酒店經紀,
合法酒店經紀,
酒店暑假打工,
酒店寒假打工,
酒店經紀人,
菲梵酒店經紀,
酒店經紀,
禮服酒店上班,
酒店小姐兼職,
便服酒店工作,
酒店打工經紀,
制服酒店經紀,
酒店經紀,

,