24.7.08

MORE ADVICE AND A POEM BELOW

i thought of four more pieces of advice based on marcos' advice located in the comments section of the advice post (two below this one). he used the phrase "michael moore's gaping butthole" and now i am transfixed by the idea. i am sitting in my closet quietly intoning imprecations against the world for allowing michael moore and for allowing his butthole and for allowing it to gape. marcos,
you are disgusting and i don't want you near this blog. but thanks. there is a poem below this post.


ADVICE BASED ON THE IDEA OF MICHAEL MOORE'S BUTTHOLE

1.
if you are arguing with someone about whether or not god exists, just raise your hand in the air curtly and slowly say: "michael moore's gaping-butthole". then raise your eyebrows and say "what now?"

2.
if you are confused and don't know whether you are talking to michael moore's mouth or his gaping-butthole, put your ear up to the indeterminate hole and see if it's annoying and has teeth or if it looks like a cave made of jelly.

3.
when your head gets really cold, just try to find michael moore's gaping-butthole.

4.
if you are hungry and you are hanging out with michael moore, there is an arby's in his gaping-butthole (fyi: most of michael moore's butthole is made of arby's. i know this because when i was eating out michael moore's gaping butthole, i paused and said, "hey, call me crazy but it kind of tastes like--"
"like horsey sauce?" he asked.
"bingo," i said and then continued to eat michael moore's gaping butthole).