2.1.09

I WILL START AN ORPHANAGE FOR MYSELF AFTER I ABANDON MYSELF

there was a problem with the cover for I AM GOING TO CLONE MYSELF THEN KILL THE CLONE AND EAT IT. here is the new cover. i am happy. the front and the back will be the same except for the color of the font.

front



back


i started reading blake butler's book SCORCH ATLAS. here is my initial review in the form of an equation:

little-kid+lsd+prurient album BLACK VASE on full blast+repeated punches to the face+an old man laughing and taking steroids and coloring his penis black with a magic marker= gottdang kid

you can order brandon scott gorrell's book.

i read an early version of this book. i read it without thinking "i want to stop reading this and i will stop reading this." i will probably read this book more than the average amount of times i read most books. give this hipster bitch your money or he will beat it out of you with his sarcasm.

you can order ellen kennedy's book.

i haven't read this but i like the bear parade book.

you can order THE BIRD ROOM by chris killen. i read an early version of this book. i think it is really good. "chris killen really poked my eye with this one." (that is my imaginary blurb).

chris killen tagged me again. here are seven more things and seven more tags:

1. today i bought some food and i was walking home and on the way home i saw a dog run into a parked car and then i heard a woman laughing and i looked at the laughing woman and she said, "you didn't see that." but i did see it.

2. last night i had a dream that i was having sex with a woman who had a giant tumor in her stomach and she died right before i came so when i came i was coming in a dead body. i don't know a lot of dream interpretation but that one probably means: "be a good person" or maybe "you are a weird asshole."

3. i used to be really good at math.

4. one time i woke up in a chair in my living room and i had my coat on and there was mud all over my hands and both of my hands hurt and when i looked at my hands there were thorns in both of them.

5. i have never felt emotion towards snow but every time it snows now i feel better even if it is only for a little while.

6. there is no one but me who can hurt me mentally or physically.

7. i have been drinking a lot of water lately. every time i get a glass, i drink half of it and then look at it and go "oh yeah." sometimes i just go "yeah."

i tag:

daniel bailey, seven times, once for each forty he has to drink between lists. that means daniel bailey has to drink 7 forties and write 49 things. ha ha asshole.

lastly, the motivational blog i write for is doing a commemorative job focus. give ma job and i will celebrate it. thank you.

here are two:

GOOD JOB WALMART GREETERS!

GOOD JOB SHIRT INSPECTORS!

21 comments:

mzreed said...

cover looks nice.
unlike you.
honky

Daniel Bailey said...

goddammit

sam pink said...

mallory: girrrrrrrl (spoken like harriet from "family matters")

daniel bailey: buy seven king cobras and write the lists or i am going to punch your ear really hard.

word verification is "ardina"

ardina is a hideous italian girl who tries to live on the grass in her backyard because she fears going into public so very much.

sam pink said...

"i got so much style i should be down with the stylistics, make up to break up, niggas need to wake up, smell the indonesia, beatcha to a seizure then fuck ya moms hit the skins to amnesia, she don't remember shit, just the two hits, her hittin the ground and me hittin the clits, suckin on her tits and ya moms ain't ugly love, my dick got rock quick."

"i'm using rubbers so they won't trace the semen, the black demon, got tha little hookers screamin."

BLAKE BUTLER said...

if i can replicate the effect of prurient i am doing ok. thanks sam

BLAKE BUTLER said...

ps: the new cover looks even better methinks

BLAKE BUTLER said...

i really like to say 'methinks' lately, until now that i am thinking about liking saying it

Matt DeBenedictis said...

That cover is a pop and lock that sends shivers up the street letting everyone know that dominance has been established.

Daniel Bailey said...

also, i want to say that # 5: the same thing has happened to me with snow lately. this year's batch of snow must be made under a new snowmaster or something.

word verification says "kinneareal," which is when greg kinnear gets fucking real.

mzreed said...

you suck.
i bet you would love to know
sam pink
that i am named after
the bitch from
family ties.

oh and.
family matters
hasnt been on
when i want to watch it.

sam pink said...

hamas

jereme said...

the new cover is okay. it has too much going on for my wounded brain i think.

i like it more than the last cover.

i would like to see more anal sex depicted on book covers.

but in a non-porn industry way.

american me but as a book cover. something like that.

sam pink said...

anal sex is the new friendship

Anonymous said...

I am so repressed that my hard ons grow under my skin, in my pelvis, near my appendix. One day I will have an operation and my blue hard on will be found taut and springy wrapped up in veins and arteries that feed my lower colon.

albie

sam pink said...

albie my stomach hurts.

Anonymous said...

Maybe your anus is inside you now. Pooing small black bricks of tube toffee. Ask your doctor to xray your tummy button and specify a search for "FUDGE TUSKS".

I hope you survive this long enough to wish you hadn't.


albie

BlogSloth said...

I would like to spend one day Wal-Mart greeting.

sam pink said...

i think if i ever get hired at walmart as a walmart greeter i will bring a bag of skittles and give each customer a skittle and tell them it is a token to get out of "the mangler" which is a torture device that the minotaur at the center of the store can strap you to.

Anonymous said...

I always fall over when I am on stairs. My face is the shape of a stair.

I look at the stars and wish I was with them.

albie

Anonymous said...

You are fake albie! iggy Pop will flex his old man body that he thinks is fit right near you!


albie(real)

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