25.1.09

YOU CAN BORROW MY SOCKS IF YOUR FEET ARE COLD OR IF YOU JUST WANT TO OWN SOMETHING

I AM GOING TO CLONE MYSELF THEN KILL THE CLONE AND EAT IT is on goodreads. i don't know what goodreads is. but it is. you can write stupid shit on the goodreads page and i will be happy.

i was invited to join FICTIONAUT. i joined fictionaut. i like it. i posted a part of the poetry book i am working on and a long play from the book of plays i am working on. someone called the poetry excerpt "a rant of unbelievable hurt." believe it baby. belee dat.

i received my copy of GUSTAF magazine in the mail the other day. it is one of the nicest things i have been in. they published everything i sent them:

THE KINDNESS PLAY
THE MENSTRUAL PLAY
I WANT TO BREAK YOUR JAW WITH MY HEAD
THERE IS ENOUGH BLOOD IN MY BODY TO FLOOD A DOLLHOUSE OR AT LEAST FILL UP AN AVERAGE SIZED SOCK
HATRED TOWARDS OTHER HUMAN BEINGS
and something else i can't remember

i also really liked brandon scott gorrell's pieces and wagner israel cilio's. mahfahckas is trill mobbin'. GUSTAF has mob stability.

i think i want to start sending out submissions again. i have a bunch of stuff.

i read blake butler's SCORCH ATLAS the other day. he emailed it to me. it's ridiculous. people talk about sentences a lot. i think the sentences are good but the ideas are better. it's like every sentences is a plot. i asked blake to send me RICKY'S BLOOD (formerly RICKY"S ANUS) and i skimmed parts but will read it front to back soon. it looks better than SCORCH. i am going to buy EVER off him at AWP then read it to a homeless man with the promise of splitting a six pack of "OJOS MALOS" tallboys.

someone told me i look like rasputin yesterday:

25 comments:

DOGZPLOT said...

whattupsammooooo

did you get the proof yet. what do you think, huh huh tell me huh huh.

clonnnnnnnnnnneeeeeeeee is coming soon muthafuskez

"tional"

crack ass crackhead pain reliver. yo playa pass me some tional.

BLAKE BUTLER said...

i like you

bruce covey and i were talking about you the other night. how you rule

like, he rules!

pees porridge hot

DJ Berndt said...

Lover of the Russian Queen.

sam pink said...

barry, i check the mail and it no there. but my landlord keeps saying "i am going to jumpkick your face then kiss it."

blake, whenever i check my email, i run the pointer over RICKYS BLOOD. i am waiting for a large block of time in which to read it all. bruce is nice. i felt shock when he accepted the work and was so nice about it. i think i mailed him some poems because i liked the pictures of palm trees on his journal's website. now i know after reading htmlgiant today that coconut is a pair of testicles that are so heavy they split the ballbag.

dj, i think someone told me i looked like him because we have sick azz beards.

i feel good today but i keep worrying i am going to realize how shitty everything is at any minute.

jereme said...

rasputin got laid a lot.

i have been told i look like the lead singer from mastodon.

i think my beard is better though.

sam pink said...

the way to determine beard strength is, if you rub them together, which one combs which?

Socrates Adams-Florou said...

There lived a certain man in Russia long ago
He was big and strong, in his eyes a flaming glow
Most people looked at him with terror and with fear
But to Moscow chicks he was such a lovely dear
He could preach the bible like a preacher
Full of ecstacy and fire
But he also was the kind of teacher
Women would desire

RA RA RASPUTIN
Lover of the Russian queen
There was a cat that really was gone
RA RA RASPUTIN
Russia's greatest love machine
It was a shame how he carried on

He ruled the Russian land and never mind the czar
But the kasachok he danced really wunderbar
In all affairs of state he was the man to please
But he was real great when he had a girl to squeeze
For the queen he was no wheeler dealer
Though she'd heard the things he'd done
She believed he was a holy healer
Who would heal her son

(Spoken:)
But when his drinking and lusting and his hunger
for power became known to more and more people,
the demands to do something about this outrageous
man became louder and louder.

"This man's just got to go!" declared his enemies
But the ladies begged "Don't you try to do it, please"
No doubt this Rasputin had lots of hidden charms
Though he was a brute they just fell into his arms
Then one night some men of higher standing
Set a trap, they're not to blame
"Come to visit us" they kept demanding
And he really came

RA RA RASPUTIN
Lover of the Russian queen
They put some poison into his wine
RA RA RASPUTIN
Russia's greatest love machine
He drank it all and he said "I feel fine"

RA RA RASPUTIN
Lover of the Russian queen
They didn't quit, they wanted his head
RA RA RASPUTIN
Russia's greatest love machine
And so they shot him till he was dead

DOGZPLOT said...

"i feel good today but i keep worrying i am going to realize how shitty everything is at any minute."

i feel like this all the time.

a few people told me the other day that they think you are blake butler and any time you appear in public it is because blake has hired an actor to be sam pink.

fuck fuck about the proof. i want you to get it and devour it so we can talk about what needs to be done yet so i can get this biotch to the printer.

"ankfu"

a retard sneezing

sam pink said...

barry, the jig is up. blake and i were twins and he attacked me in the womb biting out my eyes. now, he is seeing the things i would see and i am feeling the things he feels. blake, we have to activate the abort sequence in which we fill our cavities with strike anywhere matches and then shoot each other's stomachs with flaming arrows.

i had a dream last night that the proof came. barry, you delivered it on one of those three wheelers with the big plastic front wheel and then i had to cut the book out of a giant cube. there were words on the back of the book that i don't remember now. i think it will come today. whenever i dream that something in real life is going to happen it happens.

sam pink said...

also, i forgot to mention, it is still very difficult for me to breathe water. i tried this morning in the shower and, no deal.

jereme said...

yeah, people also believe ryan manning, zachary german and a few other vacuous types are tao lin.

people are stupid.

i am not going to lie, blake's ranking would raise slightly if sam/blake were the same person and he did hire an actor.

and wtf. why can't sam be sam and blake be the secondary personality.

i am old enough to appreciate the 'big wheels'.

it was a magical feeling the big wheels. it really was.

sam pink said...

yo socrates, what it is young blood.

jereme, it would be more plausible if i wrote better. me and blake share a prison cell and blake is the big dude wearing the black do-rag. he's got "word life" tatooed on his knuckles. and i am the wiry little white trash guy who is in jail for meth.

the problem with the three wheeler is, if you are really fast at pedalling, the front wheel skips across the ground. shit is real.

Drew Kalbach said...

your new top picture is really creepy, i love it.

olivia robin said...

sam pink. i'm not sure if i have the authority to do so, but i'm crowning you the king of blow-your-mind-one-liners.

"you can borrow my socks if your feet are cold or if you just want to own something"

i love/hate you for thinking of that before i did. the word verification letters for this comment say "ouspat"

sam pink said...

drew, yes i feel the same way. i think the teeth of the dad character are the funniest. they are like lightbulbs.

olivia, you have the authority.

"ouspat" is what a mad australian guy says looking around the room after someone spat on him.

DOGZPLOT said...

sam did you try that four liner place i sent you the link for. you have to.

"patrines"

latrines found in more patriarchal societies like hungaria or the yugoslavia

Mike Bushnell said...

Mr. Brain hands over here. No way. You propeller fingered motherfucker. Let's go sit on a tank, have a picnic, shoot little kids, and tattoo rasputin's face on your face. I think it would be something like fun.

sam pink said...

tablecloths are sticky

sam pink said...

you didn't give birth to me because we are approximately the same age.

sam pink said...

i don't know how to do a backflip because i am afraid to try it.

sam pink said...

marvelous marvin hagler feels disrespected.

sam pink said...

four lines

Anonymous said...

"We shall dream about the green wasp forever, my darlings. And never, ever see daddy again."


albie

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