13.5.09

WHAT HAPPENED ON A WALK YESTERDAY

1.
yesterday i went for a walk and i saw a very old lady on one of those like hover craft things. there was a canopy over the hover craft thing and she was smiling. she had on terminator sunglasses and was holding a drink with an umbrella, in one hand, and in the other hand she held the leash to a small poodle that followed her. she seemed to think her life was totally rad and shit. she was right. i wanted to sit in her lap and have her drive me around. i also waned to lie down on the sidewalk and feel her drive over me. i think that would confuse people who were driving by.

2.
i passed this other dude who was just standing on the sidewalk, facing the street, eating ice cream out of a cup. he was looking at the ice cream. it looked like he was thinking, "thanks for being here with me ice cream."

3.
i passed a woman walking a dog. the dog was huge. the dog stopped and nudged me with its head. i petted it. the woman said, "that's weird, he never lets anyone pet him." i smiled and said, "that is because he can feel my infinite love."

4.
i passed a woman walking with her small son. the son looked at me like he was trying to figure out if i was human. i opened my eyes wide, quickly, when the mom wasn't looking. he seemed scared. tonight he will dream about me. hopefully i will be doing something cool like eating a giant soft pretzel. those things rule.

5.
i went to Staples to print out a final draft of THE SELF ESTEEM HOLOCAUST COMES HOME. the dude at the counter put my flash drive in and was like, "which one is it?" i leaned over and pointed to the screen, and when i leaned, i smelled my armpit. it seemed like he did too because he looked up at me like, "what have you done?"

6 comments:

pr said...

Every day is a beautiful gift of wonder and pain.

Matt DeBenedictis said...

Your walk was better than the one I took yesterday.

Though I did see a man dressed like Rambo driving a mini-van. The vehicle was baby cute blue and his smile was complementary. If there are more like this man out there I say we bring bomb shelters back and shit.

sam pink said...

pr, i just ate a "totinos party pizza." so far, today is all wonder baby. all wonder.

matt, i laughed really hard after picturing the rambo guy. one time i was in a van with some friends and we passed a guy with a big rat-tail and like, those sideburns that are like, negative sideburns where they are shaved up into the hairline. he was driving an iroq (spelling?) and he had on a cut off iron maiden shirt. i said, "renegade" and everyone laughed. then they said, "wait who are you, get out of the van."

michael said...

number 2 made me feel depressed but hopeful

Martin Wall said...

Sam Pink,
Hi. I had a totinos party pizza last night. The bottom of the crust always comes off on whatever I cook them on. I try not to go out after dark, on account of the fact that I don't want to be arrested and I don't want to get into a fight. These are good poems, though. Good to meet ya.

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