13.9.11

GOALS

these are my goals for the upcoming two years.

edit and re-release I AM GOING TO CLONE MYSELF THEN KILL THE CLONE AND EAT IT

finish and publish the greatest book of american poety ever written.

finish and publish a novel about becoming an adult.

then i either want to move out of chicago and live in the woods by a small body of water or: be a garbage man or: father a really really big number of children or: kill myself in a hotel room or: get a job as someone who paints the inside of buildings like i used to do.

also, if anyone is willing to pay me to write blog posts for a week or two or however long, that would be good. i feel like i might have ideas and i could write ok articles and i need money for food and bitches and also i need to re-sole my shoes because there is a hole in each of them.

here are some examples of blog article ideas i have: "the use of second person narrative" "extreme writing" "realism and responsibility" "how to hate yourself into becoming a better person" "criticism and hurt feelings" "the internet" "my experiences as a 'writer'" "selling out"

9 comments:

scott mcclanahan said...

You should move to WV and live in my basement. It's going to happen sooner or later.

Nathan DePriest said...

i like visiting chicago. but i bet it would be a struggle to live there in the big city. I lived in Miami for a year and a half, all i have to say is that it is a nice place to visit

Anonymous said...

are you gay?

sam pink said...

i've only had sex with women and i've only been attracted to women but when i was like five or six, me and this other kid showed each other our weiners on the busride home after school. i think that that was more just a "i'm curious about your weiner" type of thing though. additionally, i work with a lot of gay men and women and the gay men hit on me a lot and turn everyday situations/comments into sexual things and sometimes i think about how given my depressed and hopeless attitude, it would be nice if women hit on me like that, because i normally let women "come to me" since i sometimes think "if i hit on this woman, it will ruin her day." so to answer your question, no i don't consider myself gay but, to recap, i have shown my weiner to another male, and do get hit on by more men than women. how's everyone doing. it's so nice out.

Nathan DePriest said...

gay bars or gay nights at bars, counterintuitively, have been great places to court chicks in the past (good places to score drugs, too). less competition for beta-males like me. and it is somewhat ego boosting to be hit on by guys even though you're not interested, though sam makes a good point, it would be great if girls hit on me in those numbers. point-blank asking a girl out that you don't know well is very anxiety-producing.
Had a similar childhood experience at a sleepover where my friend wanted to feel mine and my other friend's dicks. so he did, then i was like "i get to feel yours too" and he was like "no" but i did and was shocked by how small it was. now when i see this guy on social media i think "man, sucks about the small dick" but then i think "his life is probably still better than mine" so what the fuck, who am i to be sad for him

Jackson Nieuwland said...

I have a penis. Lucky me

Anonymous said...

are you gay?

Jordan Castro said...

move to ohio bro...

sam pink said...

yeah man, i'm gay. i fucked your dad and made him cry.