i finished a book of poetry. i think it's going to be called "no one can do anything worse to you than you can." it's four poems, each about three thousand words long. the titles of the poems are:

1. the midwest
2. human beings are toys
3. you hear ambulance sounds and think they are for you
4. a shield made of napkins

it took me almost three years to write this book. i like it.

is it the best book of american poetry ever written? simply put, yes. it's the most doomed emo shit out there. a thought i just had was "it will wipe that fucking smile off your fucking face."

here are some thoughts on each poem, and the title of the book.

the title of the book: i mean shit. so fucking powerful. it's like, you read it, and think you understand it, but then whoa, maybe you don't. it seems negative at first, but then, it's actually life-affirming. just kidding i dont know. at first i was hesitant, as it seems like a typical, "quirky" title. but then i was like, "no this is it, kid. this is it."

the first poem "the midwest" i mean shit. a good intro to the rest of the book. laughs, cries, deep fucking pain. real pain. all straight from the dark ass days of the midwest.

the second poem: "human beings are toys" shit. took me a long time to finish. feels like i worked on it for about all three years and just now finished it. this one is a little less "funny and weird" and more "straight into your ass with that dick action." i feel like this one would be in a norton anthology if the people who ran the norton anthology that year were noah cicero and maybe like, michael jordan (for some reason).

the third poem: "you hear ambulance sounds and think they are for you." i mean, the fucking goodreads ratings speak for themselves. this shit is money shoved way up into your asshole. repetition, all that shit. i dare you not to cut your arms after this one.

the fourth poem: "a shield made of napkins" i mean shit. i remember being really really depressed and angry for this one. pretty sure i was "blackout drunk" when i started it.

overall, this is a solid effort and the best book of american poetry ever written. i've been sober and focused lately, with the exception of taking exstacy with jordan castro and mallory whitten. those kids are so great. i really love them. what else, oh everything is fine and this should be a terrible winter and an ever more terrible year. think i might have a job as a janitor lined up so that feels good. wow, i just, everything is so great!

email me if you want to buy a drawing or painting or you want me to make you a handmade book or something. i need money. nine dollars an hour sucks! anyway, go fuck yourselves everyone and have a nice thanksgiving won't you!


Jackson Nieuwland said...

Thanks a lot man, now I have to wait until I've read this shit to kill myself.

How much for a handmade book called Everything Is Fantastic with an original cover?

DJ Berndt said...

shit. I'm super excited for this book.

Erik Stinson said...

tao sent me the no hellos diet and i read the shit out of it at a chinese restaurant in midtown

sam pink said...

no bro, just kill yourself.

dj, yeah man.

erik, that's good. i[m glad you read it man.